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Bed Bug Sniffing Dog

The Smoked Salmon had a bed bug sniffing dog come to the apartment, not because we had been bitten by bed bugs, but because we stayed in a beach house that she suspected of bed bugs based on no one having received bites or even seen a bug. The bed bug sniffing dog, who I’m told is called Ruby, came to the apartment, sniffed around, and sat in the corner near the bed. Ruby’s Partner, a human, declared that Ruby had found bed bugs and we needed to pay him $1,500 to exterminate the pests. Sitting equals a positive diagnosis, I was told. Oh and it would be $325 for Ruby’s services up to that point. “But where are the bugs?” I asked. “Can’t Ruby find and actual insect to confirm his diagnosis?” Ruby’s Partner assured me that further investigation was unnecessary and any further hesitation on my part put my family at great risk. “So you want me to give you $1,500 based on the recommendation of a dog?”

I got Ruby and the Partner out of the apartment with only the $325. We’ve thrown out our bed and are working on a compromise.

2 Responses to “Bed Bug Sniffing Dog”

1. 

   John August 21st, 2010, 12:39 am

   That's a New York story if I ever heard one.
2. 

   Allan September 3rd, 2010, 5:01 pm

   Next time, find out in advance 1) Ruby’s fee schedule and 2) her PPV.

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